Friday, May 1, 2009

Things I overheard #8

Some people (like myself) can eavesdrop on a conversation without anyone noticing. Although I have on one occasion been told by an ex-girlfriend that I tend to ever so slightly tilt my head in the direction of the conversation. Never picked up on this habit, but I suppose I do on occasion subconsciously do this.

Then there are others who might as well stand or sit next to the speakers because they are that obvious. Still others might as well ask the speakers to repeat a line they missed because they comment on the conversation in something other than hushed tones.

This post deals with both cases. A recurring customer at this particular Starbucks is a tutor. I've seen him on numerous occasions and so has one of the baristas. She strikes up a conversation with him while making his drink. She comments on how he is a regular visitor and what he subjects he tutors. Their dialogue is polite and friendly. Nothing to write home about.

So why are you writing about it now, you say? Because across from me was sitting a guy (who looked like a poor man's version of British comic Rob Brydon) who falls into the latter category of eavesdroppers. He was staring at the two and made a comment about something the barista had said.

Barista - "So do you tutor all ages? I think I have someone you could help."

Obvious listener - "Yeah right!"

I was looking at my computer screen, but knew he wanted me to hear his comment.

"She is totally flirting. She wants him and he doesn't even realize it! Am I right?"

I look up and give him a slight nod with a "heh." The "heh" acts as a chuckle and positive affirmation. In other words, "You're so right! Kudos on your observation." is what I try to convey every time I do that. I really hate small talk.

Plus, I think he was wrong. I'm a pretty perceptive guy and I really doubt that flirtation was what was going on. She honestly sounded like a girl looking to score a tutor for her niece.

As a sidenote, I meant to write about something that happened yesterday. Was sitting at my usual spot at my usual Starbucks when I witnessed an emo girl leading her painfully emo boyfriend into the bathroom with her. They did not come out for quite some time. I'd say they were in there for 10 minute or so.

Now what would a pure minded soul like myself think about such an occurrence in which a couple goes into a bathroom and doesn't come out for more than 10 minutes? I'll tell you what I thought. I assumed they went in for an impromptu passionate rendezvouz. In vulgar parlors, horniness overtook them and they went in for a quickie. For no particular or valid reason, I say all that went down was a blow job.

But I could be completely wrong! I could very well be slandering this young couple. Perhaps they just went into the bathroom to have a private and deep conversation that could not wait for another time. Perhaps he did something wrong like use up all her black hair dye or eyeliner and she felt like laying down the law.

I guess we'll never know.


- R