Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Things I overheard #6

Two posts in one day. I still haven't had the energy to get a haircut, but I'm counting the urge to write twice in one day as improvement.

I was actually going to write about something else, but this was just too odd not to mention.

An old man said the following to his equally old friends: "I'm going to go home and lay in ice."


Is that normal? His friends didn't find this strange in the least. So am I to assume he does this often? Is "laying in ice" his thing? Or is it some strange euphemism I don't get?

And speaking of euphemism, the actual subject of my post....

First, some background. Every Monday and Wednesday morning (don't ask. It's just our routine) my sister and I go to the same Starbucks to get a croissant and our caffeine fix (again, don't ask. It's just routine). Needless to say, the morning staff for that particular Starbucks consider us "regulars" and know "our usual."

Those of you who read The Berto Blog (because I'm not physically talking to anyone. Still not mentally ready for actual social interaction with friends) know what I am going through. That being said, I haven't been able to really laugh and smile. Until today....

My sister always orders a tall peppermint mocha, but today she got a grande. When one of our usual baristas was handing my sister's drink to her, she commented on this change:

"You got a big one!"

Without a second's pause or a spoken word, my sister and I look at each other and start cracking up. I haven't laughed like that (or at all, to be honest) in quite a while. The two of us had the exact same thought (those who know me can easily guess what what thought was):

"That's what she said!"

How obvious it is that I've corrupted my sister. I've made her a That's What She Said-er.

Didn't take much to be honest. Our father has been filling our minds with healthy (if you can call it that) doses of double entendres and sexual innuendos since Day 1. My father claims that he has done this to prevent us from being naive about the ways of the world; one time he gave us a personal story to explain his logic, but I won't be sharing it because it is far too disgusting. Even I have my limits. I've shared sexual stories involving my parents before, but this story is just plain gross..... although, he did share this story in a public place where anyone (well, any Spanish speaker) could have overheard. Ever wonder why I have no shame? I get it from my dad.


- R

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